"Cease and Desist" Featuring: Alexander Redding, Teddy Jacobs, Grady Patrick Location: Backstage The Arena of Champions was playing host to a set of new tag teams looking to make an immediate impact in jOlt. The cameras took us back to one of them: the duo known in GCW as the Big Red Hardon. Teddy Jacobs sat relaxed on the chair in front of his locker, while Alexander Redding was up and pacing. "Red, that pacing of yours is killing my zen-buzz," Teddy Jacobs blurted out plainly. It was another lap around the trampled carpet track he'd worn-in before Redding stopped and split his attention between Ted and the door. "Yeah, I guess I am a little excited. Make that nervous. How long does it take Grady," he couldn't finish his thought before the knock at the door. "Grady, about time. What took you," Red stopped, door fully flung open to reveal a man that was, "... not Grady." "That is correct, Mister....Redding?" the man in the cheap three piece suit started. "My name is Jonathan Rambo, and," he stopped when he was met with a hand held above the head of Teddy Jacobs. "John Rambo? The Rambo?" Was the line of questioning. "You look a little too young to have fought in the Vietnam war." "Not to mention a little too short and thin to be the human killing machine," Red added. "No gentlemen, I am not the fictional protagonist of a Sylvester Stallone movie. My name is Jonathan Rambo and I work with the law offices of Reinburg, Goldstein and Goldstein. We represent the interests of Moneyshot, Incorporated. I am here to present you with this cease and desist notice." The mention of the adult entertainment upstart had Red immediately shift his glare to Ted, who leaned back now, reminiscing on the three day Tour de Debauchery. His eyes smiled as he recalled the names of the girls he shared the screen with, but switched quickly to confusion when he couldn't remember many, if any, of their names. Mr. Rambo jammed the rolled up document into the chest of Redding. He accepted it with a sneer, before turning back to Jacobs. "Well, do you want me to guess what this is all about, or?" he left the question to hang in the air. Snapped out of his daydream, Teddy rebuked the would-be lawyer, "What do you want from me? I ain't even using the name Sexton Hardon. So you can go back and tell your bosses to tell Moneyshot... I am up for another shoot, like, whenever." "Forgive him, he cannot think of much more than tits and asses." "Ha! You did watch the movie!" Ted claimed in victory. "Actually, eww... bro, why'd you be watching a porno starring your's truly?" "I didn't, jackass," Red snapped back. "But I have known you for twenty years. You were staring down the shirt of our third grade teacher when she'd give us hugs." A throat-clearing cough from the junior lawyer drew attention back on him. "Yes, Mr. Jacobs, but Moneyshot, Inc still owns the rights to the name, Big Red Hardon. I am going to insist you gentlemen compete under a different moniker, or I will be back with a lawsuit next time. I am going to need that, too," he said, pointing to the shirt that covered Alex's torso. With a hint of passive-aggressiveness, Red lifted the 'Bottoms Up, Standards Down,' and 'Trojan.com' marked black tee over his head and tossed it to the feet of J. Rambo. Rambo just smiled and turned to walk away, nearly running over Grady Patrick. "Well, what are you boys waiting for? Your match starts the show," the man under the bowler's cap urged, completely unaware of the importance of the man who stutter stepped passed him in the halls. "And Red, what happened to your shirt? Trojan is going to flip if the first bit of broadcast wrestling you do in thirteen months is not accompanied with their product placement." Red gently handed the rolled and half crumpled document to Grady. "The Big Red Hardon is no more." "But," Grady paused to glance at the legal jargon, "I was this close to getting you guys a merch deal with jOlt." "I guess this makes this the Red & Ted revival tour." "Why do you always get top billing?" Teddy Jacobs asked as all three piled into the hallway and headed in a direction they hoped was the Gorilla Position. "Red & Ted vs The Modern Day Missionaries" The first match in the Phoenix Rose Invitational was ready to welcome some new blood into the Arena of Champions, and maybe some expelled blood onto the ring canvas. The house lights cut out and the crowd cheered, recognizing the cue. A simple spotlight hit the stage and the piano of I Can Only Imagine by Mercy Me rang throughout the arena. The duo of 'Ziggy' Wagge D and Brian Douglas stepped out onto the stage and drew a mild cheer from the jOlt faithful in attendance. The well-oiled "Ziggy' shined just a little more in the spotlight. The Modern Day Missionaries made their way toward the ring, taking the opportunity to slap the hands that hung over the guard rail. Sliding into the ring, they climbed onto opposite corners to gesture to the audience as the piano faded out of the PA system. The house lights came back up and the PA came back to life with a ripping drum line and thrashing guitar. 'My Reward' by Hail the Villain welcomed Red & Ted to the Arena of Champions. Teddy Jacobs popped out from behind the curtain first and was decked out in a blue/purple/pink themed set of trunks, knee pads and boots. He smiled and pointed out the one fan with a Red & Ted sign in the audience. Next out was Grady Patrick, wearing his trademark bowler's cap, an oxford shirt and tweed vest, and a pair of high end jeans. He strode with his cane in front of Teddy Jacobs and led the way to the ring. Following behind those two was Alexander Redding, with his familiar gear - the Joker grin adorned MMA pants, the red/black kickers covering up classic wrestling boots, the taped forearms and fists and that confident grin. Ted walked around the ring. Grady slid next to the announce team. Red never took his eyes off of the Modern Day Missionaries, standing at the ready in the ring. The PA cut out and the fight started with 'Ziggy' D against Teddy Jacobs. The bell rang and 'Ziggy' D rushed Teddy into his own corner. He threw a series of forearms before the ref made his way to pulling the two out of the corner. The referee backed 'Ziggy' D closer to the middle of the ring. Ziggy took the moment to smile at the cute girls in the front row. That is when Ted smiled, waved him on again. 'Ziggy' obliged, running in. Teddy Jacobs made an effort to take out the knees with a cut block, only to hit the mat, coming up empty. 'Ziggy' D had leapfrogged the diving Ted and continued the trajectory into the corner to get a forearm shiver across the jaw of Alexander Redding. Ted was down. Red was knocked off the apron. 'Ziggy' D was doing his best NKOTB dance routine. The crowd cheered the feat of athleticism. Ziggy soaked up those cheers a little too long, however, as Teddy Jacobs bull-rushed him into a neutral corner and begin with a series of left and right hooks to the body. The attack was relentless and focused as Teddy didn't even notice the ref admonishing him to get out of the corner before his five count, "Let's go, Teddy. Back it up," yelled the referee. Throwing up his hands in compliance, Ted finally backed out. 'Ziggy' shook off the effects of the body blows. He took the breather to flash the 'call me' sign to the middle aged woman two rows deep, while the ref gave a warning to Teddy Jacobs.. Side stepping the ref, Ted followed right back in with a Yakuza kick that crumpled 'Ziggy" D down in the corner. Ted looked to continue the attack, picking up 'Ziggy; Wagge D, only to have 'Ziggy' D bust out the Arms Up, Slide Down technique that had an unsettling effect on Teddy Jacobs. Teddy Jacobs turned to the ref to complain, and wipe his hands on the striped shirt. Getting no where with the ref and frustrated, he stalked back toward the corner, and was met with a toe kick to the mid section. Ted rushed in again. 'Ziggy' D slid underneath, slapping Ted's ass as he went. As Ted spun around, painted with a look of confusion, Wagge D sunk in a deep arm drag and took him to the mat. 'Ziggy' D did a two step before heading the corner, and then the top rope. Ted stood up to find 'Ziggy' flying at him from the top rope body splash, just in time to catch him with an overhead belly to belly suplex. The release was awkward, and 'Ziggy' D sailed toward the friendly corner. Ted took a moment to wipe his hands against his trunks. Brian Douglas reached over the rope to gently slap 'Ziggy' Wagge D. The tag was made. Brian rushed at Ted, only to be caught with a headbutt to the sternum that drove him back. Ted began to circle Douglas, paint-brushing the back of his head, more interested in a stand up fight than continuing the pressure. As Douglas recovered, he began to circle, too. They clashed in the center of the ring as an overhand right from Teddy Jacobs caught Brian Douglas. Another. The third attempt is blocked and Douglas laid in with a series of swift kicks to the leg, backing up Ted. The return kick attempt by Ted was caught and Brian Douglas took him to the mat with a dragon screw. Without letting go of the captured right leg, Ted was dragged back up and dropped with a second dragon screw takedown. Looking to make it the hat trick, Brian Douglas again lifted Teddy Jacobs to a vertical base. It was a split second later that he was caught with the Enzuigiri kick that sent him ass over tea kettle. Both men were on the ground and crawling to their corners. 'Ziggy' D leaned in with anticipation, juxtaposed to the relaxed position of Red. Teddy Jacobs made it to his corner first and tagged in Alexander Redding. The Modern Day Missionaries were a close second. Red and 'Ziggy' rushed toward each other, only for Red to make a left turn at the last second and hit the ropes. Just as 'Ziggy' D slowed himself down, he had to duck a lariat from Redding. He placed one hand on the back of Red's neck and sent him sailing over the top rope. Or so he thought. 'Ziggy' D had turned around, blowing a kiss to camera #2, trying to illicit a cheer, while Alexander Redding had grabbed the top rope. He held on, standing on the apron. He was preparing to springboard back in when he called out to 'Ziggy' D. "Hey, Dipshit!" Wagge D turned around, surprised that Red had held on. He was even more surprised to see Red diving through the air, fist cocked and aimed at his quad. Air Canada 'Ziggy' Wagge D was dropped to one knee as Alexander Redding rolled through the landing. He popped up and rebounded his momentum off the ropes. Red connected with a running diving knee to the back of Wagge D's head/neck. 'Ziggy' D was down and Red laughed, getting up. Red ran a thumb across his throat before dragging 'Ziggy' D back up by the ears. Red locked in the gutwrench and hoisted 'Ziggy' Wagge D up, looking for the Grady Special III. 'Ziggy' D either had the presence of mind to counter the gutwrench into a school boy roll up, or the baby-oil had struck again. Either way, the pin was made.. 1! 2! No! Red was able to kick out in time, but knelt in shock. 'Ziggy' D was the first to his feet, and he rushed back toward Redding. He was stopped cold with an elbow to the jaw. Red caught him in a hammerlock and shouted out to the crowd. "MEH!!! SHADDUPP!!" The discus lariat sent both men crashing to the ground. In the Missionaries' corner, Brian Douglas pounded on the turnbuckle, encouraging his partner to make the much needed tag. 'Ziggy' D started to make the slow crawl back to the outstretched arm of his partner. Alexander Redding earned a hail of boos from the crowd when he stomped on the left Achilles of 'Ziggy' Wagge D. He'd grab that ankle and use it to drag 'Ziggy' D into Red & Ted's corner. Ted reached over and slapped Red on the back, making the tag. Just as Ted was sauntering into the ring, 'Ziggy' D popped back up to knock Redding down with a dragon whip kick. His eyes fixed 20 feet away, to his corner and the anxious Brian Douglas. When he started to make his way, hobbled after the Achilles stomp, unaware that Teddy Jacobs was now the legal man. Ted greeted him with a kick to the back of the knee and spun him around. Last Call! Reverse STO! Douglas looked on in dismay from the opposite corner as 'Ziggy' D was sent to the mat head/neck first. Noticing, Teddy Jacobs took the time to aim a crotch chop in Brian Douglas' direction before lifting 'Ziggy' Wagge D back up. A kick to the gut doubled him over. Ted grabbed both of his arms in a double under hook. Wagge D was pulled up and planted face first. Dirty Dangle! Teddy Jacobs shot the half, rolling 'Ziggy' onto his back and made the cover. 1! 2! 3!No! The cover was broken when Teddy lifts one of 'Ziggy' Wagge D's shoulders off the mat. "What are you doing!?" Grady Patrick shouted from ringside. "I've got this," was all that Jacobs had to say. Using the ropes, 'Ziggy' was trying to make it back to his feet. Instead, his arm was grabbed by Teddy Jacobs. He was pulled away from the ropes and rolled into a triangle choke. Pants Party! With Red standing at the ready to intercept any save attempt, Brian Douglas could only pray, watching as his partner was forced to tap out before the circulation to his head was cut off completely. DING! DING! DING! My Reward sounds throughout the Arena of Champions as Red & Ted move back up the ramp, victorious in their return to in-ring action; past their first obstacle in the Phoenix Rose Invitational. Winner: Red & Ted via Pinfall "The Following Is Not A Prepaid Message For The Dairy Farmers of America" Starring: Red & Ted, George and Kaze Location: Backstage Victory is sweet. Milk is not. Somewhere in the bowels of the Arena of Champions, Teddy Jacobs walked along side Alexander Redding, who kept his glare solidly on his tag partner. Ted raised the carton of 2% to his lips, pouring it mostly in his mouth with the miss targeted liquid forming into white droplets, rolling down his beard. This might have been another promotional spot for the dairy producers of America, but this was nothing of that sort. "How," Red started, trying to focus his thoughts into the English language. "I mean, we just wrestled and your choice of refreshment on a hot, humid Florida night is Milk?" In mid-chug, they took a few more steps forward before finally coming to a stop. "Well, good buddy, I will let you know that not only is this stuff refreshing and delicious, it is loaded with the," his speech cut off with a burp. "Excuse me. I was saying it," again, this was interrupted with a belch. "Haha," Alexander took the moment to mock the vision standing before him and the jOlt cameras. Indeed, Teddy Jacobs didn't look tike the front page photo jOlt would be wanting to use as a splash on their webpage. A series of coughs and general terrible aim saw the proud beard streaked with the white stuff. The concerned look on the rest of the face only help fuel Alexander Redding's gentle ribbing. "This is not good," were the words of warning that Red was all too familiar with. The laughs were over, and Red was scanning the area of a receptacle, preferably not his shoes. Panicked, he turned to the crew following the duo, "Something, garbage can? Come on, people." The boom operator pointed out the odd garbage can just a few yards away, it was a mystery how Red couldn't see it. Or maybe he did see it, and thought better of trying to grab at the sheet metal cylinder that was wrapped in barbed wire and punctured with nails. Teddy didn't have such luxuries as, 'time to think.' He made a b-line to the odd and yet familiar can and made with the hunch and spew. Red turned away from the carnage and the cameras decided to focus on the grossed out reaction of him, instead of capturing both visual and audio of the expelling of milk, the hard-way. It was only fitting that a broadcast that jOlt was only willing to stream on their website would include something like a bad YouTube reactions clip. But that was about the time that the door beside the trashcan and the man who just recently abused it, cracked open. "Alright, George. I am ready. Let's," was all Kaze could get out when he stepped into the hall. "Milk...how...how could yo betray me like this? I just wanted your replenshing nurtients." "George, what have they done to you?" Kaze asked his closest confidant. "Ted, you might want to back away from the custodian talking with his garbage can." "Did you!?" The finger pointing was epic. Teddy Jacobs thought for a second about denying the very recent events, but then thought about how ridiculous this all was. "Yeah, I might have. I spewed in your can, Mr. Janitor, sir." The finger point persisted. "But hey, at least I got most of it in the can. Only a tad bit on the side." Jacobs boasted about the accuracy that he didn't share the first time he tried to drink the milk, still all over his beard. "Uhm... Ted?" Red said as he put a hand on Jacobs' shoulder, "Maybe we should leave the nice man to it, huh?" And with that Red & Ted started back down the hall way, leaving Kaze to look in horror at George. "Pretty odd janitorial staff they have here, isn't it?" "Quite... "Think chocolate milk would of been a better choice?" "No, Ted...no, I do not..." "The Great Supper" Featuring: Brian Douglas and "Ziggy" Wagge D. Location: Backstage, Locker Room Brian Douglas was sitting in the locker room. He had just gotten out of the shower. His hair was a dark brown and wet. He had already changed back into his street clothes. He was ready to head back to his hotel room after a disappointing night. Instead of leaving the arena, he looked at his duffel bag. He opened it up and pulled out his Bible. He thumbed through the Holy Book’s pages. He began reading and sat down on the bench that his bag was resting upon. “Ziggy” Wagge D. entered the scene. He too had just finished his shower. There was a towel around his waist. Nothing else. He noticed his partner doing something all too familiar to him. He approached Brian. Brian. His lips were held in a slight frown. “What’s the matter now, Brian?” Ziggy asked Douglas. Brian only glanced up at his partner before he returned to reading from his Bible. “I know. We lost our first match. But it can’t be that bad!” Ziggy sat down beside his partner. “Ziggy,” Brian said, stopping his reading momentarily, “I don’t think you understand. This is jOlt Wrestling! This is the place that Graphic Violence built! ‘Kodiak’ Vic Creed! erØn! Brandon Blade! The Don! This is the greatest opportunity we’ve ever had!” Brian sighed. “I don’t want to miss the supper.” Ziggy was entirely confused. “Supper?” He questioned aloud, “What the heck is supper? And why don’t you want to miss it?” Brian scooted closer to Ziggy and pushed his Bible closer to him. “I was reading Luke chapter 14.” Brian said as he pointed to the page in the book. “And I remembered what Jesus had to say about the great supper.” Ziggy looked on in excitement as Brian began reading. Then said He to him, “A certain man gave a great supper and invited many, and sent his servant at supper time to say to those who were invited, ‘Come, for all things are now ready.’ But they all with one accord began to make excuses. The first said to him, ‘I have bought a piece of ground, and I must go and see it. I ask you to have me excused.’ And another said, ‘I have bought five yoke of oxen, and I am going to test them. I ask you to have me excused.’ Still another said, ‘I have married a wife, and therefore I cannot come.’” Ziggy scratched his head as his eyes met with his partner’s. “I don’t get it,” Ziggy said, “I’m not even hungry! Why does Jesus want to invite me to dinner?” Brian chuckled. “That’s the point, Ziggy!” He informed. “We’ve been given this great opportunity and we’re treating it like it doesn’t even matter!” Brian closed his Bible before he said, “It doesn’t matter if we’re not hungry. Jesus has invited us to this great feast. We need to be there!” Ziggy’s eyes lit up. “You mean,” Ziggy said, “we’re finally going to meet him?!” Again. Brian chuckled. “We might, Ziggy.” The two embraced with a smile. Ziggy then threw his arms around Brian and gave him a firm, tight hug. “I’ll get ready now!” Ziggy jumped up from the bench. He turned around and pulled out his own duffel bag from the locker. Ziggy removed his towel. Brian’s head covered the intimate areas of Ziggy’s body from the camera’s view. Again. Brian chuckled. “We just might.” He said again. "The Roses vs Ken Kaze & George" “Where's Your Head At” by Basement Jaxx blasted around the arena as the last jOlt Ambassador Champion, Ken Kaze, stepped out onto the stage accompanied by his partner, George the Trashcan. Ken dragged George to the top of the runway before he paused and looked around at the capacity crowd. He then began to head to the ring, dragging George behind him by one of his handles. As Kaze reached the bottom of the ramp he lifted George up onto the ring apron and positioned him in the corner of the ring before sliding under the bottom rope. Kaze headed over to his corner and deliberated with George as to which of them would start the match. They settled on Kaze starting out and George remained in the corner. As one entrance music faded out, the next began. “Private Eye” by Alkaline Trio played through the arena's speakers. After a few moments Phoenix Rose stepped through the curtains in his maroon three piece suit, his arms already raised out to his sides, his glass cane dangling from his hand. A few moments later his children stepped out from behind the curtain, Chad to Phoenix's left, Ernie to his right. The three men made their descent of the ramp and headed towards the ring. At the bottom of the ramp each member of the tag team went their separate ways, slapping the hands of fans in the front rows until they reached the rear-side of the ring. The two slid under the bottom rope in unison and hopped to their feet before slapping one another five. As the music of The Roses died down, Ernie gestured towards himself with his index finger. "I got this," he said to his brother. Chad, flicking his blonde ponytail a little replied to his brother with a shake of the head and a few words. "No, mang, I got it." "It's coo'," Ernie replied, holding his hands up as if to be surrendering. "But serious, I got this." Chad put his hands on his hips and gave a huff. "Sure. Go get'm Tig—" Chad began to rebut, but the debate was short lived. Ken Kaze jumped in from behind, landing on Ernie's back, his arms wrapped around Ernie's upper chest. Ernie spun around but Kaze retained his grip as the bell sounded. Once again, Ernie flicked his body around, but Kaze failed to relinquish his grip. Ernie reached his right arm back over his head and grabbed the back of Kaze's head, yanking him forwards and snapping him to the ground. Kaze was quickly back to his feet just in time to see Ernie closing in on him. As Ernie's arms reached upwards Kaze managed to land a quick uppercut, sending Ernie stumbling back to his own corner. Slap! Chad slapped his brothers back and tagged himself into the match immediately. With as much speed as the tag, Chad leapt over the top rope, springboarding from the turnbuckle and drove a diving dropkick into the chest of the oncoming Kaze, sending him rolling backwards. Ernie, still inside the ring, looked bewildered. He turned to face his father and a debate between the two began. Meanwhile, Kaze had rolled backwards and bounced back to his feet, springing off the ropes and delivering a dropkick of his own to Chad's chest. Kaze used the momentum to somersault backwards and land right back on his feet just in time to see Chad hurtling backwards towards his brother, who was leaning through the middle rope talking to his father. Chad crashed into his brother, sending Ernie tumbling through the ropes, to the apron and out to the crash mats below, landing right at the boots of Phoenix. Chad sat on the middle rope and bounced slowly back to his feet. He half-turned to check on his brother but was otherwise engaged with his opponent who, having landed on his feet from the moonsault dropkick assault, was once again on his way towards Chad. Kaze threw a wild left hook, catching Chad in the temple. Chad threw a left of his own, sending Kaze a few steps backwards. The two, dead in the center of the ring, then began to exchange blows, one after another after another. Several shots later, the more seasoned Kaze ducked a shot, spun 360 degrees and caught Chad with a spinning clothesline, sending Chad crashing to the mat. Chad was back to his feet almost right away, but Kaze was waiting, and he grabbed the back of Chad's head, a handful of his ponytail, and smashed a forearm into Chad's face. Chad took a few steps backwards heading towards the ramp-side of the ring. Kaze closed in, again grabbing the ponytail, again smashing his forearm into Chad's face. Another few steps backwards and Chad found himself in the corner. Kaze took another couple of forearm shots to Chad's face before stretching Chad's arms over the ropes, quickly spinning around and hitting Chad with a spinning clothesline in the corner. Kaze took a few steps backwards before launching himself at Chad, driving both of his feet into Chad's gut, reaching his hands around to the back of Chad's head and falling backwards, springing Chad over with a death roll. Chad landed on his feet, turned, and caught Kaze getting back to his feet. Kaze, still on his knees, was a sitting duck, and Chad took full advantage, slamming a swift right boot into the chest of his downed opponent. Then another, and another, and another, before swinging wildly for a right boot to the temple. Kaze saw this coming and moved his head out of the way just in time, using his hands to slap the boot away and cause Chad to spin facing away from his opponent. With these few seconds to spare, Kaze got back to his feet and hopped up to sit on the top turnbuckle, his feet on the middle turnbuckle. As Chad turned around Kaze hopped off the middle turnbuckle, wrapping his legs around Chad's head, twisting and hitting a quickly executed huracanrana, sending Chad down to the mat in the center of the ring. Chad rolled back to his feet and came back at Kaze, but Kaze swiftly booted Chad in the abdomen and grabbed his arched body by the ponytail and tights. He spun Chad around a little and hurled him through the middle rope and towards the ramp. Kaze raised one hand in the air and bounded across the ring, clearly aiming to dive through the ropes at the opposite side of the ring where Chad was recovering. As he hit the ropes to gain momentum he felt a tug at his foot and the speed he was carrying sent his face planting into the mat. Right away the hands of Phoenix Rose shot up and an innocent look crossed his face. The official leant through the ropes and began to tell Phoenix to stay out of the matchup. This gave Ernie just enough time to dive into the ring and start pounding on the back of Kaze's head, before slamming the side of Kaze's face into the mat. Kaze was stunned for a few moments and so Ernie dragged him to his feet and to the middle of the ring into a reverse headlock. He gazed out at the audience for a fraction of a second before slamming Kaze's head into the mat with an Evenflow DDT. Ernie slid from the ring behind the distracted officials back at the same time as his brother Chad slid back into the ring under the bottom rope and dove on top of his beaten opponent. The official turned around, having finished with Phoenix, to see a pin taking place. ONE! TWO! Kaze kicked out. Astonished, Chad slammed his fists into the mat before he lifted Kaze up to his feet. Doubling over behind him, Chad lifted Kaze into the air in the electric chair drop position. Chad moved toward his corner where Ernie was already crouching atop the highest turnbuckle. Slapping the back of his brother, Ernie tagged himself in as Chad turned to face the corner. As the Roses were looking to decapitate Kaze with their Shining Impact trademark maneuver, jOlt's Resident Moron had a different thought in mind. Everything happened so fast . . . SUPERPLEX & HURACANRANA COMBO~! Still atop Chad's shoulders, Kaze lunged forward to hook Ernie in a front facelock before Chad could leave the corner. With a show of strength, the former Ambassador Champion lifted Ernie up and over with a superplex. As both men fell backwards, Kaze released the hold and proceeded to send Chad for a ride with a huracanrana, causing him to land on top of his brother! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT~! Ernie laid in the middle of the ring, apparently dead, completely devastated by the superplex and the following impact of his brother landing on his chest cavity. Chad rolled to the side of the ring, under the ropes, and out to the floor next to his father. Kaze was on all fours whilst holding his head, struggling to get to his feet, as he had slammed his own head into the mat due to Chad's small stature. Phoenix, of course, was irate, yelling for Chad to get back into the ring and for Ernie to rejoin the land of the living. The referee was doing his best to calm the Gimp Daddy, but Phoenix was having none of it. He motioned for Chad to go toward the corner of Kaze and George as he himself stepped onto the apron with his trademark glass cane in hand. As Phoenix was distracting the referee, Chad had thrown George up and over the top rope and slid inside the ring himself. Kaze was in his opponents' corner using the turnbuckles to pull himself up to his feet. Chad was using his feet to nudge Ernie in order to wake him up. As Kaze had finally risen to his feet, his back still turned, Chad began to approach the hardcore moron with George in hand. Turning around, Kaze caught a face full of aluminum, rusted nails, and barbed wire. He dropped to the mat in a heap. Chad smiled as he replaced George in his corner, placed Ernie on top of the fallen Kaze, and exited the ring. Phoenix relinquished his interaction with the referee as he turned around for the count. ONE! TWO! THR-- Kaze kicked out at the last millisecond. Ernie rolled off of Kaze, still reeling from the superplex, and began rolling toward a neutral corner. Kaze had rolled toward the opposite neutral corner and both men began the struggle of getting to their feet. The referee had begun his mandatory ten count and was on the count of four as Phoenix started yelling and slapping the mat to encourage his son. By the count of seven, both men were on their feet and resting in the corner. As soon as the two noticed each other, they began charging with a full head of steam at each other. Kaze leapt into the air for a jumping leg lariat, but Ernie easily ducked it and jumped onto the top turnbuckle. He quickly glanced behind him to gauge the distance and then jumped into the air with a high arch moonsault. Ernie connected as the crowd went wild. Instead of seeking another pin, Ernie began dragging Kaze closer to the neutral corner. He pointed to the sky, essentially signaling that he was going back to the air. With Kaze lying mostly still, Ernie hopped onto the top turnbuckle yet again, but this time facing his opponent. “Another bites the dust! Dust to Dust time, mang!” Ernie yelled. Out of nowhere, Kaze had kipped up to his feet and dropkicked the top rope. Losing his balance, Ernie crashed groin first on the turnbuckle, doubled over. Kaze sought the advantage by springboarding from the top rope itself next to Ernie, leaping into the sky, and connecting with a leg drop. Both men crashed to the canvas. Kaze was rolling around a bit, clutching his ass, as Ernie rolled side to side clutching his head. Kaze eventually stood up and approached his corner. Reaching over the top rope to grab George, he had for all intents and purposes, for the very first time in jOlt Wrestling history, actively tagged a trashcan into a match. He approached a now kneeling Ernie and placed George over the top of his head. Kaze stood Ernie up to his feet and positioned him closer to the middle of the ring. The crowd began to get more lively as Kaze produced a crazed smile and began his ascent to the top rope. Phoenix and Chad were yelling for Ernie to take the trashcan off of his head, but it was to no avail as the lone Roseman's head was reeling from the earlier leg drop. From the top turnbuckle, Kaze pointed at his oblivious opponent before leaping into the air. Kaze laid out his body, his feet outstretched in front of him, and connected with a commanding missile dropkick into the George-ridden Ernie Rose. As Kaze had leapt into the air, Chad had entered the ring and was making his way toward the hardcore moron. Thus, as both Kaze and Ernie crashed to the mat, Chad was already on top of Kaze, pummeling away. ONE! Chad had thrown Kaze out of the ring and followed to continue the assault. TWO! Now understanding the situation, Chad relented the attack and turned ringside to see the referee counting a pinfall. Phoenix was going absolutely bonkers as he could not believe what exactly was going on. Chad's jaw dropped as he slid into the ring to watch the ref's hand slam the canvas once more. THREE! The bell had sounded as the referee finished the three count. “Where's Your Head At” by Basement Jaxx sounded and the capacity crowd went through the roof. George had technically been the legal “man,” and thus after the dropkick from Kaze, Ernie crashed to the canvas with George still wrapped around his head and shoulders. Chad checked on his brother as Phoenix had entered the ring to give the referee a piece of his mind. The referee removed George from around Ernie's head and placed him outside the ring as he tried explaining why he counted the pinfall. Kaze, holding his head, retrieved George before heading up the ramp. Winner: Ken Kaze & George via Pinfall